It’s all about the respect…

“Uhh.  Stacey?  What the hell?!”  One of my friends whom I met through my job since she comes in with her dogs often was standing at my desk eying me as if I had a horn protruding from my forehead. 

“What? What did I do?”   I looked back at her and at first thought she was kidding about something but the expression on her face was serious. 
“What just happened?  Why do you let her treat you like that?”
Huh?  Oh. Now I knew what she was talking about.   I guess it happened so often that I didn’t think much of it anymore. You see, a few of my co workers would regularly grow bored right in the middle of a conversation with me and just get up and walk away.  No warning.   No reason.   Even if I was trying to relay something important pertaining to my job it didn’t matter.  The next thing I knew I was left alone talking to myself and feeling foolish.  Rather than pout about it I had learned to shrug it off and move on to something else.  I had been treated that way pretty much since my first day of working there.  I remember some of us were gathered up at the front after a hectic and long work day chatting away about different things before we all headed home.   The moment I chimed in on one of the conversations I was interrupted, talked over and left in awkward silence as people headed out the door and home for the day.   At first i thought it was a fluke but then it happened again and again and again.  At one point one of my other workers had made a comment about it after I was in mid joke telling and the person whom I was talking to had turned to walk out of the room.  I laughed it off but deep down it really did hurt being treated like that.  Even if it was some stupid joke or something else I wanted to share, it got to the point where I just shut off my emotions and did my best to pretend it didn’t happens.  If anything to salvage my pride.   At it was working for the most part.  It hadnt been witnessed by someone else before though, until now.  

So now I had to explain to my concerned friend what had just happened. And it was humiliating. Again.   Ugh. 

“That’s disrespectful!  Why do you let her treat you that way?”

Well.

The truth is, I don’t have an answer to that question. Even though I preferred to blend in to the background as a kid, I had begun to find my voice and my confidence after separating from Chris and therefore started enjoying more of a leadership and mentor role.  Life became fun again, and even though I was struggling to accept the fact that I would most likely never have kids of my own I could leave my mark in this world in other ways.  With life experiences and helping others.  Isn’t that what life is about?

But on the subject of how someone could treat another person with such little regard that they would walk away from them in mid conversation…. It shows an immature level  lack of respect. I know I would never treat someone that way, even if what they were saying was putting me to sleep from boredom.   I guess rather than let it get to me anymore I can be secure with myself in knowing  that I was raised better than that. 
And if they don’t want to hear what I have to say.     Then it’s their loss.   Period.      

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